Care Giver Stress - When do I Step In?

by Cindy

When do you know to step in or not?


My mom and dad are not eating healthy. My dad is healthiest, mom is in pain and on so many medicines she is always in a stupor and lacks any and all motivation to prepare meal.

Dad is capable, but lacks desire to cook or buy foods for meals. As a result they are eating peanut butter, bagels, sandwiches, fruit, yogurt and that's it. Should I be worried about nutritional value for them?

They are becoming very reclusive, stay up all night, sleep all day and never go outside except to get paper/mail.

Mom is very angry abusive to everyone, especially dad. She is on meds for depression and forgets her meds and to reorder them which is dangerous.

Should we intervene even if she gets angry?

We have tried to help with medicine organization, pill organizers, set up schedules for shopping for food that she doesn't stick to, offered help etc. thanks for suggestions.

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Intervention is a Tough Choice
by: Sylvia

Hi, I read what you wrote here and we are having the same issue....when does a caregiver child finally take over for good? When does the child become the parent of their elderly parent?

It seems although we are related, we have become kind of strangers after all these years not being under the same roof. Now that we are getting closer and closer their limitations are really showing through...bad driving, missing appointments, not eating right....

when do I put my foot down and take over, and really, if I do what strain does it put on the relationships I have with them, my husband, my friends? When they become so dependent on me do I quit my job? Do this full time without pay?

Makes me ill just thinking about the future.

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