Bewildered

Selfishness, selfishness when you don't feel yourself anymore when all is expected and no thanks are given when your jaw feels so tired you can't close your mouth. When you wake up at night, it is 3 am, and you realise you have 3 more hours to sleep and it is the biggest present ever - 3 more hours to sleep.


When you remember the time when you could do things without thinking, just do them, happily, not be 'on duty', 'on guard' all the time

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Fear, resentment, used, pain
by: Anonymous

After my husband died from cancer, I came to my mom's home to grieve, regroup. I then noticed that she was showing signs of dementia. My brief stay turned into nine years. She does not want me to work, have a social life, go anywhere, listens through the door to my phone calls.

I've been called greedy, evil, a liar, a thief, constantly accused of taking things that she has misplaced. I'm not in her will. I'm in fear of she should die, that I don't have a home, a vehicle, nothing but my clothes and few belongings. I'm so hurt, resentful, angry, sad, afraid.

I am about ready to walk out and never look back. I'm sad to say that I don't like her at all. Trapped, but planning escape very soon for my self preservation, financial security, health, and sanity.

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i know ive helped
by: welsh1

thinking about my younger years and how at times my mum wanted me to be someone i was not. i forgive her and myself for those struggles. we were always close ,as a family we all were.

my brother passed away a year ago and i was by his side when cancer took him.just when i needed to grieve i couldn't as my mum needed me and i needed to be cheerful for her and not to show her the extent of my grief.

it is so sad to see my mum ask when he is coming home because she misses him.heartbroken to see her become confused and vulnerable.i feel as though death is in my face all the time.i get severe depression but i smile for my mum

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WHY?
by: Anonymous

When you realize you're a full time caregiver but you only came back to LIVE! When you realize you can't go out of town to the most important friends' circle gathering you have EVER AGAIN 3rd year in a row! Damn damn damn!!!

When you realize they're better off than you because they HAVE YOU! When you ask God WHY? To be a leader? To sacrifice? To die a slow death? To stand up for oneself when you've always gotten short end of stick in family, in family business, in childhood...DEEP!

Anger & resentment running deep! How to squash? How to move forward? How to juggle caregiving & living?

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