Always Nasty to Me
My mother is 76 this month. My husband and I share a large home with her a mother/daughter with separate entrances. I agreed to this living arrangement with her because she has fallen several times for which I have been her primary caretaker.
She has recovered fully from hip surgeries, a broken femur, elbow and knee cap. She is active in the garden and enjoys that. However, she refuses to accept that there are certain tasks she should no longer do like shovel snow and attend to the basement when it floods. I think that the house has become too much for her to keep up with. She does not allow my husband and I to do anything...she is a control freak, yet she will complain that we don't offer to do this or that or we do it wrong.
She is in denial about her increasing age and is very vain about wrinkles and such. I am beginning to have other concerns also. The other day she came over with a shirt my husband asked her to darn and she said to me here, give this back to "Ray". My husbands name is Gerald! When I said Who? and told her my husbands name wasn't Ray and asked her what his name was...she still couldn't remember it. When I told her it was Gerald then she remembered and said she was watching everybody loves Raymond on TV before she delivered the shirt to me. Could she be developing dementia or Alzheimer's?
She often gets very angry over the slightest thing lately and directs her anger towards me. She forgets to eat her breakfast every morning and finally eats at 1 or 2:00 in the afternoon. She eats TV dinners every night. I have an older brother who is 50 who does nothing for her and is rarely around...she speaks to him nicely and never fights with him.
I have sacrificed my own happiness to be near her to make sure she is okay and doesn't fall again. My mother is a tyrant and I am seriously considering moving out to save my own health and sanity. I can't take the tirades and stress any more. Is anyone else dealing with this? I think it is time for me to move on as I have a heart condition myself.