Adopted Daughter Caring for Elderly Parents
by Arkansas 58
I was adopted as an adult so I could be a legal caregiver. My new parents are 79 and 76, while my husband in 69.
My parents are in poor health and my mother has slight dementia with a very nasty personality when she is asked to do something she doesn't want to.
She wants to sleep all day and stay awake at night. The doctor has told my father how to alter her sleep pattern, so he can sleep but he doesn't want to face her wrath.
He makes me feel guilty because I won't come in and fix breakfast at 10-11AM and dinner at 8PM.
They want me to put my husband on hold because he is younger than they and drive them around the state sightseeing.
My mother has a loaded gun under her pillow, I keep taking it out, but my father gives it back.
I am afraid she will shoot my husband if he goes in. She is not able to move without assistance.
She refuses to use her walker and insists on using the wheelchair even though the doctor has told her to walk.
They both are diabetic but refuse to stay on their diet. They will bring sweets and hide them from me or on some days actually brag about having it and saying I can do anything about it.
We have a family friend that lives next door who is helping a great deal, but he is getting tired. It is not a stretch to say it takes a village to care for them.
I am at my wits end and having physical problems with stress because of their behavior. It manifests itself even when I talk to my husband. And I am not a very caring wife sometimes, thank God he is kind and understanding.