A Mean & Hurtful Mother....
I am the sole survivor in my family and I have medical, legal & financial Power Of Attorney.
My brother ( her "baby" ) passed away Oct. 2009 & my daughter Mar., 2010. I struggled with her Alzheimer's & Dementia until I finally managed to move her to Assisted Living in June 2010.
These days, she is alternately passive, angry, aggressive, spiteful and insulting. My Mom always lived a tight little "box" where she had full control & was secretive, as opposed to "private".
Now she regularly accuses me of lying to her and cheating & stealing her money if I need to use any of it to keep up the house or buy anything that she sees as " not needed". I have my own emotional & physical issues ( just diagnosed w/ Thyroid cancer ) but she is oblivious to it all.
Everyone, including her Doctor's advise me to " do what I feel is necessary" and I do feel a certain moral & legal obligation to see to her care. I'm not particularly close to her & never have been so this is pretty rough on me.
My question: how do I accept that it's the Alzheimer's/Dementia that causes the irrational outbursts & insulting comments & not take it personally & want to just walk away?
Any comments/ suggestions / personal accounts are really welcomed. Many thanks., JoAnn